I am embarrassed to say, I am, well, was on Tinder. My chaotic and antisocial existence has forced me to consider an app to achieve some semblance of a social life.
I've been on Tinder for almost a year now and in that time frame, I've met 10 guys. Each one made for really interesting dates. When I say interesting, I don't mean great. So without further ado, I present to you the 10 guys I've met on Tinder.
1. Bob Marley
I blame this match on my profile back then. Tinder also uses your Facebook description and that I wrote when I was a college sophomore (9 years ago?). It used to say "...I love brainless pot movies," which the selective male brain then translated to "I love pot." I've gotten quite a number of matches because guys thought I was a pothead. Guy reads "I love pot" and goes "Ooh, pretty free spirit" and swipes right. This was one of those guys. In fact, our first date involved getting naturally medicated and him attempting to get into my pants. Sorry to say, I was just sleepy. In spite of that, there was a second date but this time, he tried wine. Here's the thing, no amount of alcohol or herbs can get me to sleep with a guy I don't have the hots for.
2. Mr. Sneezy
I swiped right because he seemed cute and he was moreno. At the time, I was trying to veer away from type -- the chinito mestizo. His first message involved asking me who my favorite Friends character was, to which I promptly replied "Joey." We set a date. It was a Wednesday. I had a shoot at a construction site that day and terribly exhausted. He had allergies. Ms. Sleepy and Mr. Sneezy made for a terrible date. On top of that, he didn't look at all like he did in his photos. He looked 40 when he was just 32. I have been catfished.
3. The Insurance Agent
To be fair, he didn't peddle his insurance on me. Handsome with a devil-may-care attitude, he was a hard one to resist. He picked me up from my village and we got a couple of beers at a nearby bar. His friends texted and I came with. Long story short, I got drunk. This guy is now a friend and my insurance agent. If I retire a wealthy woman, I have this guy to thank.
4. Poor Man's Dennis Trillo
That's what I thought when I first saw him. Handsome definitely but a little on the skinny side. He laid out all his baggage on the first date -- he was getting annulled from his wife. The honesty was a breath of fresh air. I was intrigued. The next two dates happened at his place where we just marathoned movies. As much as I enjoyed his company, I wasn't that attracted to him. He was my polar opposite. Also, his insistence on getting serious scared the shit out of this commitment phobe. He wanted to see me five days a week! Nobody got time for that!
5. Dull Boy
It took me a while to go out on another Tinder date due to the first batch. Meeting people is exhausting for an introvert. Anyway, I was talking to this guy for two weeks, albeit non-exclusively. I told him I'll be in Makati the next day and with a few hours to spare. He asked me to lunch, I agreed. Let's set aside the fact that reality didn't match expectations, that's the premise of life. Let's focus on how much of a dud he was. Come on man, you should have a personality at least. My friend said he'd be real handsome if he loses weight. Yeah sure, amen to that. But getting thin doesn't make you gain a personality. This was the most boring date I've ever had. Sweet guy but if I'm using an app to date, I should be able to pick someone else more exciting.
6. The Douche
This guy was a self proclaimed douchebag and knowing he's a douchebag didnt make him less of one. It did make him entertaining. Dear Peter, he was relentless so I agreed. Again, reality was cruel and after all the bad dates, I wasn't expecting much. He lured me into another date under the guise of basking on my uber wisdom. The uber consultation was spent on him trying to convince me to date him. Two glasses of mojitos were the best decision I've made that night and this week.
7. The Articulate Lover
This guy I actually like. He isn't handsome or anything but at least, I knew that. He actually looked like his photo. He's intelligent and articulate. Heavens, that's sexy. We've met around three times already but only for work. I have come to terms that anything romantic is off the table but I'm glad I met him. One of my best career decisions.
8. Batang Hamog
He isn't really a batang hamog. He was just having a really bad hair day. This guy was so "makulit." I can and will never be able to match his energy level. Also, he had a girlfriend so, no.
9. The Family Man
He was 37, estranged from his wife, and with two kids. In my defense, I didn't know about the wife and kids when I met up with him. I found out only when I saw a deep mark on his ring finger while we were having coffee after dinner. So I asked.
10. The Catch
After all the dates, I have decided to quit Tinder. It is a fucking waste of time. But right when I was about to delete the app, this guy messaged me and so I decided to play one last time. He was my last swipe and I remembered going back and forth about swiping right or not. I did because #yolo! That was a Tuesday and we met up that Saturday. Damn, what a catch. Tall, handsome, successful and with a fear of God, this guy is the guy you bring home to meet your parents. He does go out and get drunk a lot but he's still able to get up early in the morning and kick ass at work so there's really nothing to worry about. We've met four times since then. Twice in Alabang, once for dinner in Makati, and the last time in the airport before we got on separate planes on the way to our respective vacations. So far, it's too soon to tell. I'm just hoping for the best.
So that was my Tinder experience and this does not count all the other guys I never met but I've matched with and spoken to. I don't think I'll ever meet someone better than the last one on Tinder. So Tinder, buh bye. Thanks for the memories.
I've been on Tinder for almost a year now and in that time frame, I've met 10 guys. Each one made for really interesting dates. When I say interesting, I don't mean great. So without further ado, I present to you the 10 guys I've met on Tinder.
1. Bob Marley
 |
| my first tinder profile |
I blame this match on my profile back then. Tinder also uses your Facebook description and that I wrote when I was a college sophomore (9 years ago?). It used to say "...I love brainless pot movies," which the selective male brain then translated to "I love pot." I've gotten quite a number of matches because guys thought I was a pothead. Guy reads "I love pot" and goes "Ooh, pretty free spirit" and swipes right. This was one of those guys. In fact, our first date involved getting naturally medicated and him attempting to get into my pants. Sorry to say, I was just sleepy. In spite of that, there was a second date but this time, he tried wine. Here's the thing, no amount of alcohol or herbs can get me to sleep with a guy I don't have the hots for.
2. Mr. Sneezy
 |
| me on that date except without the green hair |
I swiped right because he seemed cute and he was moreno. At the time, I was trying to veer away from type -- the chinito mestizo. His first message involved asking me who my favorite Friends character was, to which I promptly replied "Joey." We set a date. It was a Wednesday. I had a shoot at a construction site that day and terribly exhausted. He had allergies. Ms. Sleepy and Mr. Sneezy made for a terrible date. On top of that, he didn't look at all like he did in his photos. He looked 40 when he was just 32. I have been catfished.
3. The Insurance Agent
 |
| source |
To be fair, he didn't peddle his insurance on me. Handsome with a devil-may-care attitude, he was a hard one to resist. He picked me up from my village and we got a couple of beers at a nearby bar. His friends texted and I came with. Long story short, I got drunk. This guy is now a friend and my insurance agent. If I retire a wealthy woman, I have this guy to thank.
4. Poor Man's Dennis Trillo
 |
| A skinnier version of this handsomeness. source |
That's what I thought when I first saw him. Handsome definitely but a little on the skinny side. He laid out all his baggage on the first date -- he was getting annulled from his wife. The honesty was a breath of fresh air. I was intrigued. The next two dates happened at his place where we just marathoned movies. As much as I enjoyed his company, I wasn't that attracted to him. He was my polar opposite. Also, his insistence on getting serious scared the shit out of this commitment phobe. He wanted to see me five days a week! Nobody got time for that!
5. Dull Boy
 |
| source |
It took me a while to go out on another Tinder date due to the first batch. Meeting people is exhausting for an introvert. Anyway, I was talking to this guy for two weeks, albeit non-exclusively. I told him I'll be in Makati the next day and with a few hours to spare. He asked me to lunch, I agreed. Let's set aside the fact that reality didn't match expectations, that's the premise of life. Let's focus on how much of a dud he was. Come on man, you should have a personality at least. My friend said he'd be real handsome if he loses weight. Yeah sure, amen to that. But getting thin doesn't make you gain a personality. This was the most boring date I've ever had. Sweet guy but if I'm using an app to date, I should be able to pick someone else more exciting.
6. The Douche
 |
| source |
This guy was a self proclaimed douchebag and knowing he's a douchebag didnt make him less of one. It did make him entertaining. Dear Peter, he was relentless so I agreed. Again, reality was cruel and after all the bad dates, I wasn't expecting much. He lured me into another date under the guise of basking on my uber wisdom. The uber consultation was spent on him trying to convince me to date him. Two glasses of mojitos were the best decision I've made that night and this week.
7. The Articulate Lover
 |
| Yeah, he has a beard. source |
This guy I actually like. He isn't handsome or anything but at least, I knew that. He actually looked like his photo. He's intelligent and articulate. Heavens, that's sexy. We've met around three times already but only for work. I have come to terms that anything romantic is off the table but I'm glad I met him. One of my best career decisions.
8. Batang Hamog
 |
| This is actually a million times better than his hair source |
He isn't really a batang hamog. He was just having a really bad hair day. This guy was so "makulit." I can and will never be able to match his energy level. Also, he had a girlfriend so, no.
9. The Family Man
 |
| source |
He was 37, estranged from his wife, and with two kids. In my defense, I didn't know about the wife and kids when I met up with him. I found out only when I saw a deep mark on his ring finger while we were having coffee after dinner. So I asked.
10. The Catch
 |
| source |
After all the dates, I have decided to quit Tinder. It is a fucking waste of time. But right when I was about to delete the app, this guy messaged me and so I decided to play one last time. He was my last swipe and I remembered going back and forth about swiping right or not. I did because #yolo! That was a Tuesday and we met up that Saturday. Damn, what a catch. Tall, handsome, successful and with a fear of God, this guy is the guy you bring home to meet your parents. He does go out and get drunk a lot but he's still able to get up early in the morning and kick ass at work so there's really nothing to worry about. We've met four times since then. Twice in Alabang, once for dinner in Makati, and the last time in the airport before we got on separate planes on the way to our respective vacations. So far, it's too soon to tell. I'm just hoping for the best.
So that was my Tinder experience and this does not count all the other guys I never met but I've matched with and spoken to. I don't think I'll ever meet someone better than the last one on Tinder. So Tinder, buh bye. Thanks for the memories.
posted from Bloggeroid
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